I was reading an article today in a magazine that had to do with loving the bodies we have. Gosh, I look in the mirror and see this overweight, getting older, mistreated, abused body and wonder how the hell I'm I suppose to love this? How should I not, is what I really should be thinking. I'm mean, it is the only one I will ever have. It's not like any of us can get up one morning and run down to the local new body dealership and say, "I really hate this body, what kind of trade in do you think I can get on a new one?" Good grief, I wouldn't get one plug nickel for the model I have now.

The author of the article I was reading said if you think about someone that dies, don't you think they would think about what type of body they would have if they were to have the chance to come back to just hug someone they loved or even have just a few more days as a walking, breathing body. You know I have never thought of it like that. Matter of fact I have never thought that this IS the only body that I will ever have and only have one chance to live in it. So that brings me to the question, why would I ever abuse this body with overeating and lack of exercise? Why do I not like myself enough to take care of the one thing I have that is never going to leave me? Man, I didn't think of that either. This body will never leave, its stuck to me and my personality till the day I die, its never going away. Oh sure I could loose parts of it if I were to change my bad eating ways and start just walking every day.

This body, is the one true thing that is just mine. I can share it if I want but its really it is the one thing on this planet that I can truly say is mine. I don't owe anything for it, hell, I didn't even have to pay for it, it was given to me as a gift. I sure didn't take care of this gift very well. Hmm....that's a lot to think about this early in the morning. I think sometimes we need to just slow down and be thankful for the bodies we have been given.

Look at all the things our bodies do for us, I mean they do let us down sometimes, but look but they have pulled us thru and the wondrous miracles they have performed. I know at some point in my life that my hands will fail me. I have rheumatoid arthritis and I do not see a doctor for it right now plus I have carpel tunnel. Right now as I'm typing my finger tips on my left hand are pretty much numb. I know I can have surgery for it but right now I don't have the money for the deduct able or the time built up at work to take off for the procedure. So it will have to wait for another year I guess. Other than the things that will fail, look at the things that your body does everyday that we all take for granted. My thighs for instance, even after all this abuse, can still pick me up out of a chair and carry me around where I need to go. My arms, still can lift or reach to hug a child.

I'm coming to a point in my life that I want to slow down and take notice of the things around me and stop trying to hurry thru this one life that I have. I want to stop and see, feel and taste the things around me. Another point the author said was how many times in life are we rushing around so much that we don't even stop to taste the food that we are consuming. I mean really taste it. We don't. That's something that I really want to try to change. I want to slow down and enjoy this life AND this body that God gave me. And if I really try maybe I will learn to love this body and myself a little more each day. Loosing the weight is not going to make me love myself or even like this body any more than I do right now. I have to figure out who I am and why I have treated myself so badly.